Avraham Poupko - speaking with people, speaking with God

Avraham Poupko is a software architect who specialized in designing large scale software systems. When he is not designing software he likes learning and teaching pshat in Tanach.

Avraham is married to Gital Wolf-Poupko. Together they have 5 children and 1 grandson.

 

Editor’s note: Avraham is the most creative and stimulating presenter I have ever seen, no matter what the subject. His lectures were always packed!

 

 

1.       What was a place, person or event that transformed your ideas, thinking, or perspective?

 

In a former hi-tec workplace, we had a senior manager called Yossi Tsuria. He had a brilliant mind and was a highly effective manager. But in addition, he was also a talmid chacham and was able to find creative ways to connect the Torah with technological ideas. I try to emulate that kind of thinking. One specific example, before meeting Yossi, I had thought that a dvar Torah was only for religious people but for people who do not live Torah lives, a dvar Torah might not be relevant. Yossi believed the Torah had a message for every Jew and at every company gathering, Yossi would give interesting and thought provoking divrei Torah from which everybody could learn and grow.

 

2.       What Jewish message does the world need to hear?

 

Put away your electronic devices one day a week.

Give yourselves a time when instead of being immersed in electronic devices, social apps, and videos, engage in deep, face-to-face, meaningful communication. It is an important part of our emotional and family health.

Even for a person who engages well with people, this is necessary. Let’s say you are developing an idea in conversation with someone and your phone pings. It is an interruption, the train of thought, intimacy and relationship is lost temporarily, and you have to pick it up again later. This is competition to relationships especially with your children and it is damaging.

One of the books that has influenced my thinking in this area is Hamlet’s BlackBerry by William Powers.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0061687170/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_4QAA5H3N7ZVZRSDK76SS

 

3.       What was a turning point in your life that led you to your current path?

 

In 12th grade I was planning on geting a Phd in physics and teaching. A friend, who is now a history professor, told me that the future and the money is in computers. I followed his advice and got a Bachelors and Masters in computer science and worked in the area ever since.

 

4.       If you were to give advice to your younger self, what would it be?

 

Try to be as unemotional as you can in a work setting. Losing temper ruins careers. People like people who are objective, calm, friendly, and take criticism well. Not being able to remain calm under pressure damages work relationships.

 

5.       What is one way that you spoil yourself a little?

 

I like photography. I buy photography equipment. Recently I bought a high-end drone and I’m learning how to use it. it is not a very justifiable expense, but it is a creative outlet and I find satisfaction in it.

 

6.       How do you get back on track if you have had an unproductive or distracted period?

 

What works for me is Shabbat. Take Friday and Shabbat off, take time off, rest, go for a walk, to enable me to reorganize thoughts, reset priorities. Motzaei Shabbat, put thoughts together and hopefully Sunday morning, come back reinvigorated. Don’t panic or hurry – this will not work. it happens to everyone. A good night’s sleep may not be enough – give it the weekend.

 

7.       What is the best advice you ever received?

 

About 20 years ago, Yossi Tzuria told me that no matter what I do, I should find opportunities to teach. He said - you are good at it, you enjoy it, it will fulfill you and give you meaning. I have been teaching ever since.

 

8.       What do you consider as your biggest achievement in the last 5-10 years?

 

A year ago I was let go from a job I had for over 20 years and I was already in my 50s. It was a big blow to my self-esteem and my ability to find a job. I decided to rejuvenate, learned new technologies, and followed up on CVs. I sent out my CV at least 50 times. I landed on a certain company with interesting work, with people I respect and people who respect me. I am doing good technical work and feel I bring real value to the company.

 

9.       What area do you see that Rabanim/teachers do not stress enough?

 

The importance of humour. Don’t stress so much – yourself and your students! It is a wonderful educational tool. It teaches not to take yourself and situations too seriously. A well-placed joke can do wonders to diffuse a tense situation.

 

10.   What part of Jewish learning is your main focus or favourite? How would you recommend people to get more deeply into it?

 

I like learning pshat of tenach. I find it meaningful and inspiring. Not everybody likes pshat.

I recommend the 929 site and books of Rav Amnon Bazak. Or just to read through tenach and discuss at the Shabbat table or with friends without perushim.  Bereishit would be a good start. It is about people and families trying not to kill each other! Somebody asked Dennis Prager why all the families in Bereishit are dysfunctional. He answered – all families are dysfunctional.

 

11.   I have often thought that we in the modern orthodox community are walking a tightrope between different worlds both of which we want to belong to and be active in which may detract from our full attention to one or the other particularly to the Jewish side. Can you give some ideas or direction how to connect more deeply to the Torah and Hashem? (Books, ideas, programmes, activities)

 

Firstly, I like to ask those sort of questions. I find meaning in discussing them. For instance, how do the minutiae of Torah laws and the complexity of the universe complement each other. I love reading about this – Rabbi Sacks and other thinkers. I don’t have a satisfying answer yet but I find the question to be a stimulating question and one I care about. I want the relationship to work, I want to figure it out. That makes it meaningful to me.

 

Secondly, I work many hours at work and I am always busy. But no matter how tired I am, I go to Shacharit every day with a minyan. And I try to understand and concentrate at least on part of what I am saying.

 

Some say that when you learn Torah, God speaks to you and when you daven, you speak to God. Sometimes I find that when I pray, God speaks to me too – it is a dialogue. 

I live in a world where I believe my livelihood depends on my skills, hard work, having the right job, investments, etc. When you daven, for a few moments you realize that it is worth praying for too. It is not only about what you do but it is also about being humble in front of God. It is easy to say everything is from Hashem, but do we always believe that and behave consistently?

 

In other words, I try to understand and concentrate on the words of some of the prayers so that they speak to me. When I say in ashrei – “You give openhandedly, feeding every creature to its heart’s content” (translation from Sefaria) which refers to livelihood, I find it relevant even though I have a good job. I also follow the minhag to touch my tefillin at this point. It is obviously a central point in davening and one I make effort to internalize.